Tattooed Chains
whittled by disdain, of fleshly pain
baneful temptations diseased temperament
relents, wild longing that seethes
breathes passion, igniting muses flame
became, redemptions river of scars
carves flummery, as awareness heals
repeals negativity, dissolves delusion
sun shining, step outside thinking
winking, in the now, of enlightenment
silent seeds, scrolled in withered papyri, lay
C’est la vie, mon amie
© ~ Randy Bell ~ 2013
Jan 20, 2013 @ 16:57:02
Very crisp use of the chained rhyme–I think it really mixes well with both internal and a little end rhyme, as you’ve done here, without being too forced sounding. I especially like some of your phrases:
‘river of scars/carves flummery,’ and the opening six lines, which get the poem established with a great cadence, all the way to the brisk close. Thanks for joining us at toads in this challenge–enjoyed reading your response.
Jan 20, 2013 @ 20:08:01
Thank You for the excellent and informative prompt !! Really enjoyed the form and found it challenging as well !!
Jan 20, 2013 @ 18:29:49
This is so well done, it reads beautifully aloud.
Jan 20, 2013 @ 20:08:34
Thank You !
Jan 20, 2013 @ 22:54:28
liked how you used the chained rhymes form here.. flowing..
Jan 20, 2013 @ 23:08:20
Excellent use of rhyme!
K
Jan 21, 2013 @ 06:13:32
I love this. Great rhythm and rhyme, and a lovely piece of art.
Jan 21, 2013 @ 14:16:32
Thanks Misky
Jan 21, 2013 @ 07:23:34
..love the word ‘flummery’
nicely done 
Jan 21, 2013 @ 07:25:26
Thank You kkkkaty
Jan 21, 2013 @ 13:34:45
fabulous entry for the chain poem. the rhythm of the poem mimics the movement of the tattoo in the image.
Jan 21, 2013 @ 14:17:32
Thank You Kim
Jan 21, 2013 @ 13:59:51
“as awareness heals
repeals negativity, dissolves delusion”… love this!
Jan 21, 2013 @ 14:18:03
Thank You Laura
Jan 21, 2013 @ 20:34:37
Great use of the chain form. Loved it.
Jan 21, 2013 @ 20:38:28
Thank You Sherry
Jan 21, 2013 @ 23:35:25
Love this, Randy.
Jan 22, 2013 @ 00:16:05
I can’t even read your poem; I’m too distracted by that groovy tattoo.
Just kidding. Sort of.
These are my favorites:
“whittled by disdain, of fleshly pain
baneful temptations”
“carves flummery, as awareness heals
repeals negativity, dissolves delusion”
“winking, in the now, of enlightenment
silent seeds, scrolled in withered papyri, lay”
Jan 22, 2013 @ 20:38:03
Wow! Very sensual, and great word use, Randy. k.
Jan 23, 2013 @ 21:41:05
Great job with this form, Randy! It reads smoothly and the rhymes, as Hedge said, are not forced sounding. I enjoy that you worked from a pic for the inspiration!
Feb 05, 2013 @ 22:14:08
this not only sounds pretty, it also paints a pretty picture
epideictic rhetoric
Feb 05, 2013 @ 23:31:37
Makes me want to try this form that I’ve never written to. Nicely done, Randy. I like the flow.